Saturday, August 27, 2011

Worth It!

Its been awhile since I have blogged, but I am going to try to keep up with it cause time is going so fast and I want to be able to look back on the SPECIAL memories. This year has been a rollercoaster ride for me; going through custody battle, accepting being a SINGLE Mom, Quincy being diagnosed with Petit Mal Epilepsy, Jazmyne being a carrier of sickle cell. These are the things that make me ask Why Me God? Why God does my son have to take seizure medicine? Why God is my daughter a carrier for sickle cell? Why God?

Sometimes I want to cry when Q asks, Why do I have to take yucky medicine? Oh sweet sweet boy of mine because this yucky medicine makes you better. It all started last year November 2010, life was crazy with a 2 1/2 year old and 1 month old. I had been noticing something going on with Quincy at times but didn't think much of it in the beginning. Then Dad came to me after having Quincy one day and said have you noticed this...Quincy would be eating, talking, playing, just doing whatever and freeze for about 20-30 seconds all while being noresponsive and then pick right back up with what he was doing. I said yes I have but just thought he was acting out cause attention wasn't only on him. Dad and I talked about it for awhile and I decided that when Jazmyne went for her checkup I would talk to Dr. Cannata about it. This is where I felt like a BAD Mom. I told Dr. Cannata what had been going on and the symptons Quincy was showing, as I heard the words he said to me my HEART sank to my stomach. Lets get him in as soon as possible for an EEG, Im thinking Petit Mal Epilepsy. Tears streaming down my face I say ok. Two weeks later I take my baby boy for his EEG and oh how my heart was aching as he laid on the table sleeping while they tested him, he had 2 seizures during it and the next day I got the phone call I was hoping would say he is fine. But instead I heard, Quincy has what we call Petit Mal Epilepsy, absence seizures but he does need to be medicated for them. Why God? I had mixed emotions only because Im glad we knew what was wrong but I was hoping nothing would have been wrong. Quincy has done so good about taking his medicine which makes me so proud. He goes every 3 months to Dr. Welch to check his blood levels, kidneys, and depakote levels. Everything has always checked out great and now its been almost 1 year since we found out and he hasn't had a seizure! He will have another EEG in November to check his brain for firing signals. I Pray that they have good news for us, but I know if they don't that God will continue to keep my son safe & healthy! God will forever love Quincy!



Jazmyne Rose oh my heart is complete with this little girl. I sometimes find myself Praying for time to stand still so I can be able to cherish the time she is little a bit longer.With Quincy I didn't realize how fast time went and how he grew up so quick. Time with Jazmyne has flown by, I have loved every second of it but sad that my BABY is quickly turning into a BIG girl! Jazmyne is a GIRL for sure...she LOVES being told how cute she is, she has quite the attitude when she wants, and she knows what to do to get her WAY! Jaz is now almost 11 months old, walking, talking, EATING (she loves to eat)...she is the perfect fit to Quincy and I! Jazmyne has grown so fast, she is going to be TALL Im thinking! She has the best personality for the most part but oh man can she throw a fit, haha. Must be a girl thing cause I don't remember Quincy ever throwing fits maybe I just tuned his out I don't know. Papa is in trouble because not only does Quincy love him and wanna go with him but now Jaz does too. She always scolds him when he tries leaving and doesn't take her...of course he loves that so he will come back and stay longer or take her for awhile! Quincy isn't to keen on Jazmyne going to the farm like he does, he isnt ready to share the cows, horses, dogs, 4wheeler or his PAPA!!! They also love their Gma Terri why oh because she BUYS them anything they want haha! No thats not the only reason haha, she is a great grandma to my babies! She loves spending time with them as do they with her! Jazmyne will be 1 soon and it makes me sad that it could possibly be my LAST 1st birthday. But oh so HAPPY because I know their are great times to be had as she grows up into a sweet little girl and young lady.


God has blessed me with a beautiful Son & Daughter!
Love’s not a feeling
Love’s not convenient
But I know love will change your life
Love takes sacrifice
Love cuts like a knife
Sometimes love will make you cry
Love’s not easy
But it’s worth it
Love is a hunger
But love won’t leave you empty
See it’s the language of the heart
Love can steal your pride
But love won’t let you hide
It takes everything you’ve got
Love’s not easy
But it’s worth it

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